“I'd like to thank
our servicemen and women for their recent efforts in the light of
this catastrophe, but I think the real hero in this situation was
Batman,” said the Mayor. Batman smiled, quite arrogantly. No-one
asked him to make a speech, but that didn't stop him delivering a 45
minute pre-prepared explanation of how he thwarted the Joker.
Everyone was bored and wanted to go home, apart from the Mayor, who
listened intently to Batman's tale, and bit his lip seductively.
Batman shot the Mayor a cheeky wink. “Get a room you dirty bum
bandits,” thought the surprisingly homophobic detective. Robin
looked on, seething with jealousy, but also slightly stimulated by
the frisson aroused by the thought of Batman's infidelity. He tried
to hide his lumbering hard on, but it's exceedingly difficult to
conceal an erection when wearing nothing but pants and tights on
one's bottom half, or so I imagine. “And so in conclusion,”
concluded Batman, “I think that not only am I the hero that Gotham
deserves, but also the hero that Gotham wants to shag.” Every
applauded politely. The Mayor was a bit annoyed that Batman stole his
finishing line, although he couldn't possibly stay angry at those
pecks.
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